Monday, September 15, 2008

My Son is a Stander a Very Good Stander

My oldest son is playing football for the first time in his life. His father never played football. I never played football. Football is a foreign language in this house.

My son seems to enjoy playing, if you call standing on the sideline until the last twelve seconds then running in the game to do whatever it is they do out there, if you can call that playing football then I guess he likes it.


Here's the thing.

I don't like football. Especially when I go to my son's game to watch him play and I sit on a hard bench in the cold waiting and waiting and ooooh he's going in...nope, waiting and waiting and waiting. Why am I here? Can I go home? Will someone call me if he gets to go in? I'm going to go warm up in the car and listen to the radio. At least that's what I'd like to do. But, I sit and wait. And as the last minutes of the game tick to a close I see him run in and do whatever it is he does. Except I can't really see him because he's on the other end of the field and I have no idea what's going on out there.

This is what I know for certain. I only enjoy watching my children's games when they are actually PLAYING IN THE GAME. If they aren't participating I don't give a flying flip about anyone else on the field, I don't care about the score, I don't care about the call the refs are making, I just DON'T CARE! I'm there for one reason, My KID.

And even when my kids are playing it's sometimes hard to stay pumped up. There have been numerous baseball games and soccer games that I've begged Clay to give me the keys so I can just go home already.

So, I'm wondering if I should approach this football thing a bit differently. Maybe, I should think of it as an opportunity to get to watch my son STAND for two hours. Stand with his back to me with fifty tons of pads and gear strapped to him. Yes, this change of thinking could do me a world of good next time I decide to fill my gas tank up and drive an hour to my son's standing game.

Does your son play football?

Me-No, he stands.

Whaaaa?

Me-He's a stander. He stands. He likes it. He stands very well. He's a very good stander. I'm proud of him for standing.


Ah and then there's the gear. The lovely loads of gear. The mud stained, sweaty, smelly gear that he piles up in front of the door because obviously that is the safest spot for fifty tons of pads and plastic and spandex and whatever else there is, that's the best spot for it to be, in FRONT OF THE DOOR!!!





Now, if you all will excuse me, I'm going to go make food art to de-football my brain.




This is what I look like after a Standing Game. Yes, I really do look that good.

23 comments:

Clayvessel said...

Kids sports.
What IS the point?? Tell me again what they are supposed to be learning?
My oldest son spent two seasons of little league on the bench. Even though there were "rules" about how much each kid should play, ours didn't. (He was a strong healthy kid too, not the runt of my litter) It sure didn't build his self-esteem. It didn't teach him team work. It sure as heck didn't foster any skills with the ball. It was painful for me and for him. Writing a letter of complaint to the coach didn't help either. So why did we do it???

Go with music lessons.

Beth said...

Congratulations on your stander! He sounds accomplished and very good at it. Think of the patience.

I'm sure he shares that level of patience at home with all of you, too.

Crunchy Chicken said...

Ummmm.... that nose looks a little suspicious. Do you know it's origins?

I like how it's conveniently placed between the, uh, ... nevermind.

Lori Radcliffe said...

Well, see, here's the thing: I don't much like football either. But when I go to watch my son "stand" I have the privilege of sitting on metal bleachers...in Arizona...where we don't shiver...ever...

Flutterby said...

Take a book, a nice, warm, fleecy blanket with a hood, electric socks, a large thermos of good coffee and a bag of delicious munchies. But especially take a book.

Jenni said...

Um, that food art looks rather, uh like something else. It's made me forget what I was going to say about the rest of the post. No, wait, it's coming to me. Oh yes, my son is a stander too. I don't go to the away games where I know he will be just standing or sitting (varsity especially), but one of us does have to pick him up from the school at late thirty. Friday we have a home game and I will go sit in the stands and watch my son sit or stand on the sidelines. Go Josh! I think I will bring a book or some mending or something to keep me from going out of my freakin' mind.

Psuedokim said...

I have a great tip for you! My God Daughter has been a cheerleader since she was three (she's now 13!), so I've had to go to more little kid football games than I care to remember. I used to get in a bad mood just thinking about it until I figured out this tip: BRING SOMETHING TO READ!! Nothing too involving that you'd have to concentrate on, just maybe a magazine or something light; I even read a cookbook once when I had nothing else. Believe me, this changed my football-watching life.

On a different subject. I spent a glorious few weeks reading all of your archives and had a great time doing it. I noticed something - you mention Aldi's sometimes. Let me tell you, my mother-in-law is in LOVE with that store. She should be getting paid from them with how often she mentions what a great deal she got on this or that; in fact my husband and I kind of laugh about it, because it's every Sunday dinner: "Wow, this ______ tastes good!" "Oh, I got it for 89 cents at Aldi's!" So here's the thing; the first time I went in there with her I got scared. I'm guessing yours must be a lot nicer/newer for you to go there. A new one opened up near us and I want to try it, because there's no doubt about great prices. I have no idea why I just told you that story, except to say I'm trying to be an Aldi's lover too.

Anonymous said...

April, stop playing with your food and eat. :) Margie

Trisha said...

I love your food art! Quite a self-portrait!

Rhea said...

Your food art rocks! You need to blow that picture up and frame it!

In our kids' sports around here kids are supposed to get equal playing time. And they do. And my kids LOVE it.

My 11yr old is playing football for the first time, and I knew NOTHING about it. You should have seen my trying to buy the equipment. I think we made twenty trips to Academy and Sports Authority to get the right stuff.

And, I don't know how they get in and out of those pads without wrenches and the jaws of life. Looks soo uncomfortable.

Anyway, bring a bag of word puzzles or knitting or a camera...or a pen and paper to work on blog material. I do that, so when my son isn't playing, I'm occupied.

And when he is playing, I have to ask my husband and my stepfather a million questions about what's happening. It looks like a bunch of boys hitting each other to me. I can't even find the ball half the time. Whew

Jennie said...

I agree about wanting to just go home already. But no, we're good Mommies and we stay where we are told watching our sitters or standers.
I just try to remember that even if I don't care, they do, and seeing my face there matters to them. So there my sweetly smiling face will be while my mind and butt are dreaming of being elsewhere :)

Lindsay said...

wow, don't move that cucumber.

I tried really hard to to write that, but I can't help myself. Please don't tell your kids youth pastor that I wrote it:)

Egghead said...

Oh I hear you. I stood and sat for so many games while my son played, er stood, that I could have screamed. I am not a fan of football but he and his dad are huge fans. That means right now all I hear blaring from the TV is football. Arggggh!

MrsCoach said...

Just a word of advice from a bench warmer myself and high school coaches wife---- go find the coaches wife and sit with her. She can chat, gossip and occasionally glance at the field, see the stance her husband is in and clue you in as to whether or not it's going well. You'll make a new friend, she will have someone to talk to that doesn't need to tell her how bad her husband sucks at his job and you might learn enough football to make you dangerous. PLEASE GO FIND HER SHE NEEDS YOU!!! And bring cookies and coffee, she realllly likes those!

cndymkr / jean said...

If you got rid of that cucumber you would have the perfect ...

I thought this was a family blog? Is this how you home school sex ed to your kids? Cause it is a pretty cool idea!

Far Side of Fifty said...

Is it that cold in Kansas already? You are cold?? Wear a parka..forget fashion..warmth overules fashion. Congrats on having such a good stander! In years to come you will say, I am so glad I was there at EVERY game and got to see all that standing:)

Puddintane said...

My step-daughter did a season of flag football a couple of years ago. That was 2 months of getting up at 7:00am on a Saturday to sit on the sidelines while a bunch of 4th graders run up and down a field. It was not exciting but I give her a heck of amount of credit for being the only girl out there.

Rhea said...

Ok, I'm gonna give in and ask...have you read my blog before? Don't read today's posts, they sucked. But last Monday-Friday was much better...

Rosanne said...

Glad to know I wasn't the only one who though your food art looked like something else! LOL

Ilyanna said...

Even better than a book -- some sort of MP3 player with book on tape! that way you can watch your youngling stand, and if something happens you can actually see it and not have to lie later when he asks if you saw him do a little sitting to spice up the standing.

Romi said...

Does that mean that your son is in good standing with the team if he's a very good stander? :-)

That happened to my daughter when the coach of her soccer team quit and one of the dad's took over and replaced my daughter with his. We had to drive far and wide across the country to watch our kid be a very good bench sitter.

Accidental housewife said...

Why does your nose look like a turd.

muddywaters said...

I was an All-State Stander/Clapper in high school. While I do see the value in participating in a sport, I get tired of how it's emphasized in our culture.

I teach, and we hired a new math teacher this year who isn't certified to teach math. He's a PE teacher who coaches football. I don't understand the logic. If I had students attending the school, I'd be upset.