Friday, July 04, 2008

Why is my blog so boring?

Could it be because I only have access to a computer when Clay gets home and I have to share the time online with my daughter?  Leaving me too tired after she gets done chatting to her bazillion little friends online?  Or is it because I left the battery charger to my camera in Goodland and can't post new pictures?  Or is it just me?

People, these questions are rhetorical, please don't answer them, please, please.  My ego begs you not to.  

Tomorrow we are having a bunch of people over to eat and play.  I am not making anything on Pie Oh Dear Woman's blog.  Crimeny.  Doesn't that woman know what a hotdog is?  

Actually I'm sick to death of hotdogs and hamburgers so I bought the biggest brisket I could find.  That sucker looked like a Flinstone's size drumstick in my grocery cart.  Then I came home and started hacking off the fat and shoving it in my crockpot.  This is how I cook.  I hack, cram and shove.  No delicate folding of fluffy whipped cream.  No whisking the batter.  No chocolate curls.  Just cram, hack, shove.  

There will be no pictures of my hacked meat nor will there be directions of how to make anything in my kitchen.  There will not be pictures of happy people shoving piles of hacked meat into their gobs.  Nope.  Because I am a boring blogger.  

All I have are photos that my blogger friend took that I keep posting because they are so much better than any picture I will ever take in my life.  This photo reminds me to tell you that I hacked off Clay's hair.  See?  I hack meat and I hack hair.  And I have no way to prove to you that his hair is short.  If this blog were a class I would be searching desperately for an excuse to tell my teacher why I don't have my assignment complete.

And then she would tell me that I've failed Blogger 101.  That's when I start to cry just like I did when I was explaining to my Chemistry  teacher that I'd just given birth to my second child two days ago and I needed to take the test I missed while I was in the hospital pushing forth one of the largest heads ever known to man......until my third child was born, but that's another story.  And you know what?  The tears worked.  Or maybe it was the fact that he got a glimpse of my two day old infant and noticed that the baby didn't need one of those head support things in his car seat because he was the size of a four month old and I was just a wee bit wobbly and pale and probably a lot pathetic while I was standing there in my somewhat baggy maternity clothes sobbing because I was more concerned about a Chemistry test than my post natal situation.

And that brings me back to this blog.  Hack.  Shove.  Cram.

Happy 4th of July.  I'm going to go blow something up.


Peggy said...

Have a great 4th! And thanks for starting my day off with a smile

Trisha said...

Hey - finally someone talking about cooking on a blog like the cooking I do! I love reading the recipes but will I ever actually make any of those wonderful things I see? NO!

I am sure your brisket will be fabulous! Happy Fourth!

Mylinda said...

I love your "boring" blog!! lol Sounds like mine! Have fun today hacking and cramming! :-)
Happy Independence Day!

cndymkr / jean said...

I love the picture of you and Clay. Now go blow something up and have a great weekend. said...

Sounds like you've borrowed my 'tude. Lemme know when you're done with it as I will need to hack & cram a few items today as well.

Aunties said...

Dear me,
You and your funny sister are related at the brain and the hip!
You certainly both got 'IT' in the humor department!
Thanks for the chuckles on this rather boring 4th of July.

Coffee Bean said...

Your blog is not boring! You crack me up! I find your farm life very interesting seeing as I am so stuck in suburban hell. I like the differences in your and your sister's blogs and homes. She's in a big ole farmhouse in Kansas but everything is really brand new. You are in a really old farmhouse in Kansas and really trying out the farm thing. Both of your homes are gorgeous! Your senses of humor are similar, yet you are different. I love the bantering that sometimes goes on between your blogs. I just have brothers so I've always been a bit envious of sisters.

Marilyn said...

Hey, you ragging on chocolate curls?

Your blog is one of the least boring I know. It probably has to do with the absence of softly lit whipped cream. :)

What a great photo of you two!

Lori Shaffer said...

Your blog is boring because you don't talk about baseball. Duh...

Karen Deborah said...

Umm no I'm the boring one. Haven't thought of anything funny in weeks. I post cooking pictures without recipes because I don't cook with them. You can probably make some of my stuff. No precision required.
Last week you were cussin (kinda) this week your planning explosives, are you ok? There's not to much after that,...streakin?

Clay said...

I like that picture, especially the part where you're laughing at the back of my head.