Wednesday, July 30, 2008

P-Dub Love

Dear Pioneer Woman,

Today I'd like to dedicate my blog entry to you and all your lovely fans that have sifted their way over here from your sight, to Rechelle's sight and then quite amazingly, to my humble abode.  I am seriously gobsmacked.  



You know how you call yourself P-Dub? Well, I think from now on I'll shorten April Showers to A-Yus. Only thing is, that my little nickname sounds a bit like a proper southern lady yelling at her husband after he's traipsed mud on her beautiful Oriental rug.  But, that's okay.  Because...because....Oh...I want to be just like you when I grow up!  I do!   So, A-Yus it is.

Now, I took some photos the other day that I thought you could relate to.  You see I have a very special relationship with the bovine creatures in my backyard.  I know, so do you!  See?  Seriously, we could be BFF's now and forever!  P-Dub and A-Yus BFF!!

Okay, so here's what I did.  I used my cow whisperin' skilz and asked the ladies if they could express some love for you.  Remember P-Dub, these girls are what we live for.  They are the reason we get out of bed in the morning.  You get up just a wee bit earlier than me, but still, I gotta see me some cows everyday or I just don't feel right.



First, I had the girls gather in a circle and say a prayer for your safe return to the ranch.  I mean goodness, what would we do without you?  And who else would show us those yummy pictures of cowboys in chaps?   ....wait!   I meant yummy pictures of FOOD, yeah, that's what I meant, yummy FOOD.  Amen.


Next, this little gal meekly walked through the crowd to speak to me.  Her Mooma taught her to control her emotions and never ever loose control of herself in public.  Let's face it, she was homeschooled.  But, she just couldn't resist sending you a teeny tiny black tongue kiss.  Next to Oprah, YOU are her favorite celebrity.  Shhh, don't tell.   If you do, she'll have to go back to wearing her denim jumper to the swimmin' hole.





Ah, yes.  Then the redhead came up.  She laughed really loud, said something about her makeup, the heat and how much she sweats, needing to renovate the pasture, wanting black high heels, feeling that she would be better off in California if only she would have stayed with the crazy bull she had dated back in college...blah, blah, blah.  I tell ya Ree, oops, I mean P-Dub, I didn't think she was ever gonna shut-up.  Then she complained about the food and wouldn't it be nice to have raw fish once in awhile?  She said you'd understand.  Whew, I hope so, cuz I was about to poke her in that big eyeball! 


This chick came over and sang a few Ethel Merman songs just for you.  It was fabulous!  But, then she came closer to the camera and blew out a mind numbing belch the likes I've never heard.  Oh, I'm sorry Re...P-Dub, it's hard to get quality bovines these days.






And that leaves me to close this post.  P-Dub, I am gobsmacked.  Seriously.  I have lost my chin over the number of folks that have dribbled over here because of you.  It's a shame that I'll live the remainder of my life with my chin stuck to the back of my throat, but it's a burden I'm willing to carry.






This is, what it feels like to be gobsmacked.

Love and Slobbery Kisses,

A-Yus

30 comments:

Romi said...

All I think of when I see A-Yus is the movie called "The Toy" with Jackie Gleason. His name in the movie was U.S. Bates and throughout the movie he was called U-A-Yus by one of the other characters.

I did find you through P-Dub and your sister. Glad I did. I think you're just as funny as P-Dub...Keep up the good work A-Yus!

~Mad said...

A-Yus,

YOU are so hysterical - loved the bovine moomas!

~Mad(elyn) in Alabama
www.xanga.com/madewyn

Auntie Em said...

I'm a new A-Yus fan, thanks to P-dub, and can I just tell you the strangest thing has happened to me over the past few days? I have the word "poopmoreola" stuck in my head the way a song sticks and plays over and over! Not sure how long it will last, but it sure does make me giggle. Thanks, A-yus!

cndymkr / jean said...

It's nice to see that you are finally getting the notice you deserve. But I'm still sticking to calling you April. Sorry.

lifeinredshoes said...

She's got nothing on you.

The Cube Monkey said...

I trickled (ooo that didn't sound right) over from PW.
Glad I did, you and your sis are hysterical and for the most part, that's the only kinda blogs I read outside of work. They help lighten up the day. So no no no!! Thank YOU! =)

Deborah said...

I guess I will join the legions of interweb wanderers who found there way here via CDW and PW. My DH's family used to live in a tiny town called Jenkinsburg and the folks behind them had cows. My DD was only 1 at the time, and she'd love to go visit the cows, saying "Hey, Boo!" so from then on, was known as "Boo" to all of us. Most people think she's nicknamed after Boo Radley. Love your and CDW's blogs.

Naomi said...

I am among the throng that has moseyed on over...you ladies are the kind of funny I wish I was. I have a good sense of humor, but not the kind that makes people laugh at stuffing a chickens parts back in while you are showing lovely pictures of making a cherry pie.
Thanks for letting us all join in.

Mama Hen said...

You are too funny! You and Ree and kindred spirits for sure!

Just getting in touch with my ol' country roots. said...

Friggin' Halarious A-yus! P-dub and all the rest of your "home girls" are throwing up signs of love for you. Can you just see it now, "Rollin' up with the crew and the posse of stick girls (the beautiful bovines)saying...Yeah, whatcha gonna do bout it now, huh?" "Back off...or we'll put honey on your poopmoreola!" (To replace the former saying of putting a cap in your a--!)

I am officially and forever more one your stick girls too (just not the bovine part)...Whenever ya need me home girl...I got yo back!

M-Love (Of the OG Variety)

Melissa said...

I also found you because of P-Dub. You're bookmarked now in my daily visits section. Thanks for making me chuckle!

Anonymous said...

I've been reading you for a long time. I love your site. And I don't even remember how I found CDW's site, but I came here from there. A long time ago. Margie

Violet's Mom said...

The cows are cute, but I like the chicken pictures!!

Jenni said...

A-Yus,
You are too freakin' funny! I want to be like you when I grow up!

Trisha said...

I love P-Dub too but I must say - the whole gobsmacked thing made me laugh!

I didn't find you through her site but I must admit - she does have quite a following.

That is YOUR future too, A-Yus!

Deborah J. said...

Yep...from PW to your sister then to you. Both you and CDW help make my work day alot more fun. You two must be a riot when you're together.

Keep it up and I'll keep stopping by. So glad PW directed us your way.

Nikki said...

P-Dub sent me this way, too, so I totally get your ode to her. And I've always wondered what it looked like to be gobsmacked. So, thanks.

Anonymous said...

Think I'll go with A-Sho instead of A-Yus, just has more of that homegirl ring to it.

Yo Yo....A-Sho is in the hood, ya'll! LOL

I've been a daily follower for several months and look forward to visiting every morning. Between you, Rechell, and PW I'm always guarenteed a good belly laugh!

Love ya homegirl..
Bertie

Jen said...

Freakin' hilarious! I'm so glad to have found my way to you. P-Dub...CD...I'm greatful I tellyou, GREATFUL!!!

Stephanie/Idaho said...

Love it! And I am one of the 'throng' - and I have you bookmarked too - gotta visit you and PW every day.... Thanks for the giggles. You guys make my day. Every day!

Angie said...

And I get a number of trickles from you. Thanks, April! I enjoy your blog.

notmuchofacook said...

I am so glad that P-Dub sent us your way (and your sister's). You 3 make me laugh every day. The chicken story is a keeper! Keep 'em coming.

melissa said...

I found you to through PW and CD. Love your site . Love the sick chicken pictures.

Anonymous said...

Good Afternoon,
I found you through your sister through Pioneer Woman. I love all all these blogs. I start my day with them, which starts me off on a happy track. I guess I indentify with all three of you. My youngest daughter has four kids that she homeschools and they all live with my hubby and I.
She thinks I should start blogging about my 8 grandkids. From a "Rockin" grannies point of view. Maybe someday.
Keep up the craziness.
Lila in Atlanta.OSXSSNMU

Sandra D said...

I too wandered over from PW's site and then to your sister's site. I was cracking up with the whole chicken pooper thing...my kids were not thrilled about the pictures. Which is why I made them look at them twice...what kind of sick homeschool mom of five am I?!

jennifer said...

april- i'm totally loving your blog! i found it from your sisters, and the chicken thing was way too funny! and today's post was even better yet! the only thing that you left out was whining about being a middle child! are you a middle child? keep up the great work- i added you to my blog roll, and check every morning!

Susie C said...

Good morning. Since I drifted your way, also via Pioneer Woman and your sister, I am enjoying your ramblings as much as theirs.
Keep sharing. I'm not living vicariously through anyone but I sure enjoy reading about you all enjoying life as much as I do.

Nancy said...

A-Yus...fits you just perfect. You're too funny.

Diane C said...

Good Morning A-Yus! I found this site via P-Dub, via CDW. LOVE it. Thanks for sharing.

Leigh said...

yep... found my way here from the pioneer woman. That woman has a following, doesn't she?! Your blog is highly entertaining. Thanks for the laughs.