Thursday, August 09, 2007

If only I had Spidey powers...

Monday I was brutally attacked by a huge lethal spider.  Or so I like to say.  I didn't actually see the spider, but I felt it and it hurt.  By Tuesday the area where I was bitten was purple and very, very sore and my face was sort of hot.  Then Wednesday morning I woke up and was covered in a total body rash.  That's when I googled spider bites and decided all my flesh was going to rot away if I didn't go to the doctor.


The doctor asked me if I had actually seen the spider.  No, but I'm pretty sure that a ginormous furry spider crawled up my skirt and bit me on my thigh.  Then he asked me if I was feeling any heightened senses.  That's when I shot a web out my arse, spun him around eighty-six times and threatened to serve him to my young for dinner.

After the fun was over I got a prescription for antibiotics to fight off the infection I'm sporting and a warning to stay away from spiders.  Since I'm going through my storage room today I swear I've "seen" a gazillion spiders, but then they turn into dust bunnies, Legos and wads of paper.  

By days end I can promise I will need a stiff drink and chocolate.

5 comments:

~*~ Jennifer ~*~ said...

OH, Oh... I've got the heebie jeebies now. THANKS!!

So sorry about your bite... that naughty spider -- it's mother never taught him/her any manners -- it's mouth ought to be flicked!! And HOW!

Angie said...

Wow....a chicken death and a spider bite all in one week! That's a little too much excitement don't you think?

Seriously though, I am sorry that the spider got you. That is not fun.

When do you actually move?

hope4grace said...

OMG, I would start drinking now....horrible fear of spiders!

Jill said...

This had me in tears. I love the amazing places you shoot webs from--I think I need to try that next time the hubby starts back-talking...

My mom loves your blog and got me hooked!

Crunchy Chicken said...

Damn. You can shoot webs out of your arse, too? I thought I was the only one who could do that.