Wednesday, February 15, 2006

The Screaming Woman Unleashed

Yesterday was Valentine's Day. We celebrated with all the homeschoolers from our church. My dear friend D. said, "Hey wanna have a party?" I said, "Yeah!" So we sketched out a plan, made calls and voila instant party with 54ish kids and 13 moms. It all went really well until after lunch the 54ish kids had no direction or planned activity to follow. One of the games was "jump the river", you lay two ropes parallel and spread them farther apart each time a kid jumps over until they start "falling in". Well the ropes turned into an instant tug of war game run amuck with all ages pulling and screaming, it was all good. I was standing watching the mayhem unfold when I notice one of the 5 year olds stuck in the middle of the rope panicking and the two sides were pulling while he was saying, "No, No, No". It's funny that of all the moms surrounding the scene I am the one that screams, "STOP IT!!! STOP IT!!!!" in my most hysterical authoritative voice. Well, it had an instant reaction those kids scattered like roaches when you turn the light on. I grabbed the rope and rolled it up and said something like, "that'll be enough of that..hah ha ha ha ha". Then I realized, I'm the only one that reacted to that. Am I a control freak? Fast forward 40 minutes.

We were cleaning up. My two oldest needed to go to their BLC classes and a friend was waiting to give them a ride. I had told Seth to get his socks and shoes on and get his backpack...twice. I looked across the room and saw that he had not moved from the chair he was lounging in, so out came my drill sergeant voice "SETH! MOVE! NOW!" The child catapulted out of the chair and I turned to see two or more of my friends snickering at me. Good grief! I am a psychotic, overreactive, power monger devouring all small children in my path that don't listen to me or cause chaos.

Did I mention that I was strung out on cold medicine and 24 oz of high fueled coffee? I had the jitters most of the day. Thank God I don't do recreational drugs, I would be a menace to society.
But, my sister told me today that I do have a very low tolerance for chaos. This is a true statement, and therefore I should not be the person planning parties for 54ish kids.

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